I’m so grateful to be sitting here writing my success story. When I was diagnosed with H, I had a really hard time with it and what I thought it meant about me and my dating life going forward. I seemed to think about it constantly. I would run scenarios in my head about having “the talk” daily and quite honestly, it was exhausting. I stopped living my life and started worrying all the time about something completely outside of my control. Then I met someone and had to deal with it or run away….
Sometimes I felt like bolting, but here in front of me stood this amazing man who really cared about me and valued me. I knew he was worth the risk. We talked all the time and it felt easy with him. After about a month, I really felt like I could trust him and knew regardless of how he felt about the H, he would respect me. I just knew. I struggled inside with telling him and the annoying nagging in my mind was driving me nuts, so one night I decided I’m telling him right now.
I told him I had something important to talk to about and since I trust him and I feel like our relationship is moving forward, it was something he needed to know, before we could go any further.
Then I asked him if he had ever heard of a cold sore. He said “yes”. I said “do you know what virus it is?” He said “yes”. I quickly said “do you get them?” He told me he used to when he was a kid. Since, I have type 1, that was really good news to hear. I explained to him that my last boyfriend did too and through oral sex he had spread the virus to me genitally. He seemed a little confused and did not even know that was possible. I told him since he already has the virus the likelihood of me spreading it to him genitally is extremely low, however there is a chance.
He responded “is that what you needed to tell me? You’re not getting rid of me that easy” He also said he wanted to research it a little on his own, but no big deal. Then we went on talking about other things.
It has never been an issue. We have been intimate since then and he has no problem with it, at all. He loves and adores me exactly as I am. He truly is such a gift in my life. It is amazing how much freedom came with telling him. I no longer have obsessive thoughts and H doesn’t control me. I realized I was the one that had made it such a HUGE deal in my head; it was my beliefs and fears that had created all this dread. Love it far stronger and greater than H ever could be.
I hope this story helps just one person. Please know when you find someone that loves you for who you are nothing else with matter, not even H.
YES!!! This is soooo beautiful!!!
Thank you for coming here to show people that most of the time, it's out self-limiting beliefs that hold us back. Sure, we may be rejected when we disclose ... but self-rejecting (ie, bolting) is only self-stigmatizing and self sabotaging .... it's only by allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and taking risks that we will find that love that we all are searching for....
I'm so glad for you that you took that risk :)
(((HUGS)))
Great news! So happy for you!
Congratulations :) That is awesome!
CONGRATS!!!
