The self-development trap

With "self-development" being so cliché these days, let's not get caught in the "better, better, better" trap. How can it be a trap? If we aren't careful, then even self-development can be leverage for more shame. If we hold ourselves to high standards (definitely recommended!), then we also need to balance that with self-compassion for when we inevitably stumble along the path.

This doesn't mean that we don't try to get better and develop who we are to be the best version of ourselves possible — that is, of course, a great goal! And I see time and again that self-development can also turn into a form of work, drudgery and whipping ourselves into shape, a response to the fear of not being enough. Like a brutal overseer, mercilessly judging ourselves into being more a better and more loving human being (the ultimate mindfuck).

So stay on the path of being the best version of yourself you can possibly be at all times (it's a life path, after all) while also being unconditionally loving to yourself. Hold both simultaneously. That is the practice.

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